I deceive myself so easily. I promise myself that I’m absolutely, resolutely fine. I tell myself all I need is to start a new routine. I hold myself up on these stilts of fragile smiles and over-enthusiastic nods. I’m brittle and always off balance.
Read MoreI had plans, big plans, vacations, reunions, and new adventures. Things were booked but I’d been a soggy heap for the past month. Coalescing into a more-or-less-capable-human shape was exhausting. I was sweating to keep that shape together for my work week, and I was consistently failing.
Read MoreI was twisted up, like a rag being wrung out. I leaked and leaked for days and then weeks and then a month. Tears, choking sobs, hopes, visions of what might be, and plans for the forthcoming months, it all ebbed out of me. It flowed into every corner of my life.
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